Thursday, February 14, 2008

Happy Valentine's Day from the Big Apple, or Why I Left New York

New York City is giving out free condoms today to help its citizens celebrate Valentine's Day. Last year, the city gave out 36 million of the condoms and hopes to beat that record. This year, the city is running an ad campaign on television and 1,000 subway cars to promote the free condoms.

The citizens of New York City, if they stop the think about it, should rise up en masse and demand a tax rebate. As Ronald Reagan used to point out, if you don't starve the government beast of tax revenue, there is no end to the extent that it will meddle in our personal lives.

The condoms include a new packaging design that features the 2008 slogan: "get some." Seriously.

Finding a constitutional right to have sex of any description is one thing. Subsidizing it with tax revenue is quite another.

As Fox, via Drudge, reported:

Street teams from the health department will meet commuters around the city Thursday to hand out the new NYC Condom for Valentine's Day, officials said.

Hand-out locations include Times Square, Wall Street and near City Hall.

Of course, a government program of such importance requires its own government agency, the "Department of Health and Mental Hygiene." (Can someone explain to me what on earth "mental hygiene" is? I'm familiar with mental health and personal hygiene, but only New York could combine the concepts.)

Any New York City establishment -- whether it's a health club, coffee house, bar, barbershop or clothing store -- can order NYC Condoms in bulk by calling 311 or visiting

Presumably, that includes cat houses and frat houses.

The operators who answer the city hotline this evening will have some stories to tell tomorrow: "The Health Department will deliver free NYC Condoms as needed to meet demand" (emphasis added). Now that's service, by a government that really cares.

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